One of the biggest misunderstandings about domestic violence is that it only occurs when one partner or member of a family physically assaults another.
Domestic violence can be verbal, financial, emotional, psychological, physical, sexual, cultural or spiritual. All these forms of domestic violence can have significant impacts on the physical, social and emotional wellbeing of victims.
At its core, domestic violence is about an abuse of power and control to dominate or instil fear over a partner, ex-partner, carer or family member.
At The Wealth Farmer, we stand against violence and abuse in all its forms and recognise that physical abuse is just one of many types of domestic violence. We understand that domestic violence can happen to anybody, but that, victims are disproportionately women and children.
It happens in all layers of society. I have come across it with clients who live in the Eastern suburbs, the North Shore as well as here in the Highlands in Burradoo. It happens to not only women but also men.
The main type of abuse that we come across at The Wealth Farmer is financial abuse. This takes the form of the following:
- Having complete control over the household finances or limiting access to bank accounts
- Not allowing the victim to work
- Denying their partner access to their own pay
- Monitoring their spending
- Using their partner’s money without permission
- Controlling their superannuation and investments
Financial abuse quite often leads to or goes together with psychological and emotional abuse.
- Blaming the victim for all the relationship problems
- Undermining the victim’s self-worth or self-esteem
- Withdrawing engagement with the victim
- Emotional blackmail and suicide threats
- Gas-lighting: denying things happened as they did
- Threats to harm oneself
- Threats about custody of the children
- Telling the victim no-one will believe them
If you or someone you know is suffering abuse please speak up. There are organisations that can assist and help.